


the feelings i have for her (in my heart)

by orphan_account



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: (everyone ends up fine! don't worry this is before the sads), F/M, Falling In Love, Getting Together, The Raven's Roost Rebellion, blood tw, buff weaver julia, moderate injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-05 16:47:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16371377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It takes a single moment for Magnus to fall deeply in love with Raven’s Roost’s rebel queen.





	the feelings i have for her (in my heart)

It takes a single moment for Magnus to fall deeply in love with Raven’s Roost’s rebel queen.   
  
Julia is one of Raven’s Roost’s native daughters and the people love her. Her mother is a weaver, her father a carpenter, and she has lived in the Craftsman Corridor her entire life. When Kalen comes and declares himself leader, enforced by a well-armed guard,  Raven’s Roost is not surprised that it is Steven’s strong daughter that moves to take their town back.   
  
Stealth is not really an option with this type of overwhelming operation. This works out in Magnus’ favor as he is presented to Julia midway through the rebellion. She stands over her dining room table, surrounded by her neighbors as they plan a path through the city to break some portion of Kalen’s defenses. Even in this moment of power with a sword strapped to her back, she looks gentle and warm. She has the skirt of her wine wool dress tied up for easier mobility showing thick brown leggings and practical leather boots. She has a pile of curls mostly contained in a bun at the base of her skull but stray pieces fall around her face, in her eyes, behind her ears.   
  
She is the most beautiful woman that Magnus has ever seen in his entire life. His heart squeezes uncomfortably as he bends on one knee before her. 

  
“Oh god,” Julia says quickly, “We don’t need that. Stand up, tell me your name and your purpose.”     
  
Magnus stands, a faint flush on the back of his neck. “My name is Magnus Burnsides,” He says quickly, “My purpose is to offer myself up to Raven’s Roost in support of your liberation. I fight well and believe that I could be of some service to you.”   
  
Julia eyes Magnus cautiously. “And if I would say that I would accept your help but not in the form of violence, what would you do?”   
  
“I have some experience as a carpenter,” Magnus says, “I would offer my hands to you to strengthen your community in any way you see fit.”   
  
The answer seems to please not only Julia but her small party of neighbors she had been planning with. Julia smiles as she gestures towards the table.   
  
“Come with me, Magnus Burnsides,” She says, her formal facade falling, “I’m sure that I can find some use for you.”   
  
Magnus follows, suddenly planning to follow Julia for the rest of his life.  


Julia’s heart is slower to turn. She is fighting for the town that grew her, for the attic where her mother taught her to card while her father worked steady, back and forth with his handsaws in the woodshop underneath them. They have a storefront where Julia’s been working for as long as she can remember. She knows her neighbors by name, knows that the Hannah the blacksmith will sharpen her father’s tools for a year in exchange for five hundred yards of spun wool. Julia knows that the storekeeper breaks the crates he uses for produce every other week and sends Julia back the broken crates back full of food in exchange for replacements. Julia knows that her best friend of ten years grew up to be the headmaster of their little school and that if she makes the mistake of walking one of her goats anywhere near the school the door will open, and she will get tackled by small children ready to pet a goat while Andrew  _laughs._    
  
Raven’s Roost is all Julia’s ever known; she’s never wanted anything else. Julia plans to stay totally focused as she regains control of it.   
  
Magnus Burnsides changes things.   
  
Magnus is new to Raven’s Roost, which makes Julia wary, but her fears are almost immediately blown away. At first glance she had feared him a man made for war, seeking conflict as he makes his way through Faerun. His face is scarred, his hands are battle calloused, and his shoulders are strong enough to hold his ax without strain. Julia had thought it reasonable to worry.   
  
Magnus quickly proves her wrong.   
  
They build a barricade through the Craftsman Corridor in the dead of night, separating Kalen and his supporters from where the people of Raven’s Roost have gathered. Judging from the wall’s anticipated size Julia expects it to take a long time to raise, through the night at least.   
  
Magnus shows up at the build site at dusk, his sleeves rolled up and his tools ready. Magnus smiles at Steven as he dumps his bag down in the center of the street.   
  
“You ready, son?” Steven asks as he hops down from the cart he just parked. It is loaded with junk; broken crates, enormous barrels, broken furniture, logs as wide as legs and much more. The entire point of the blockade is to make an unclimbable barrier to protect them from their foes. How to make it isn’t well defined other than  _pick up heavy shit and make a really tall pile._  
  
“I’m ready,” Magnus says as he walks over and hoists a barrel onto his shoulder. He carries it over to the center of their barricade and sets it down upright.   
  
“There we go!” He says, “I don’t know what you guys were talking about, this is going to be great.”   
  
Magnus, Steven, and Hannah work endlessly to build the barricade. When Julia checks their progress, she can see Magnus and Steven pulling pallets into the center of the street or Magnus and Hannah stacking crates taller than they can see. Sometimes people need to take breaks. Steven leans against the Hammer and Tongs as he takes long drinks of water. Hannah sits amongst the yet unused crates as she catches her breath.  
  
But Magnus? He never rests. The barricade grows under his hands. Julia stands beside her father a little after three in the morning, the street lit only by porch lights and lanterns.   
  
“I expected him to slow down,” Steven says as Magnus starts to brace a finished portion of the wall with heavy logs. “He doesn’t show any signs of stopping though.”   
  
“I think he really cares,” Julia says with wonder as she watches Magnus sweat and bleed for her little town. Magnus bends to lift an armful of planks. He stops mid-step to push them further up in his arms before carrying them to the far side of the wall. “I think he’s one of us now.”   
  
“I think so too,” Steven says. He stretches, “I’d better get back to it. It shouldn’t be too long now.”   
  
Hannah pulls Julia outside just before dawn. The light is hazy and soft, an orange-purple blur all around her. The barricade is a beautiful disaster. It’s easily twelve feet tall, made of jagged edges and terrain too dangerous for Kalen’s men to climb. Magnus sits near the top of it, shaking components of the wall to make sure they don’t need any more fixative between them. The sun peaks up behind him and Magnus looks like he starts to glow, light filtering through his hair.   
  
“It’s all secure, Steven!” He calls, “I think I’m going to hop down from here.” Magnus looks below him to prepare for his drop. “Oh,” A smile blooms across his face. “Hey, Jules.”   
  
Julia’s breath catches. “Mornin’ Maggie,”  
  
For Julia, that’s all it takes.  


They float around each other for a little while, both of them knowing but also nervous about making the first move. They are both strong, confident, and powerful people. Magnus had thought this part would be easy.   
  
Love, Magnus finds, requires effort. He can’t just wait for it to happen.   
  
The conflict between Governor Kalen and Julia’s resistance has been growing. After they secured the Craftsman Corridor there was a sharp shift from their previously tense standoff to their current physical conflict. Magnus carries his ax with him everywhere he goes, even in the Craftsman Corridor, just in case.   
  
Magnus is sent to escort a family to the Craftsman Corridor from the Market District on the other side of town. They’d been fine living on the edge of the Resistance’s territory up until now but as the conflict has been growing, they’ve been more concerned about having their children out in the open. Magnus must go to the edge of the Market District and bring them back, quickly. A month ago, a week ago, this wasn’t dangerous. Today everything is dangerous.   
  
Magnus buckles up his armor in the Hammer and Tongs workshop, where he has been staying since he first came to Raven’s Roost. Julia leans in the doorway. Magnus secures his bracers with ease but buckling up his jerkin gives him trouble. Magnus twists to try and work with the buckles that sit against his ribs but the stretch is awkward. It usually takes Magnus several minutes to work this out on his own.   
  
“Need a hand?” Julia asks with a smile.   
  
“If it’s not too much trouble,” Magnus says, “I’ll get it sometime this year.”  
   
Julia has no problems with the buckles on either side of Magnus’ chest but when she finishes her work she doesn’t step out of his space. Her hands rest on his ribs, flat against the flexible armor. As Magnus breathes her hands rise and fall with his chest. Julia is so, so close. Magnus can smell the soap in her hair, some faint combination of citrus and flowers.   
  
“You sure you’re going to be okay alone?” She asks.   
  
Magnus nods. “I’ll manage,” he says. “You can count on me.”   
  
Julia smiles. “I didn’t doubt that,”  
  
Magnus hesitates before leaning forward. His hands float to the middle of Julia’s back as she wraps her arms around him tightly. Magnus dips his head and rests his chin on Julia’s head.   
  
“Jules–” He says.   
  
“Shh, wait,” Julia says. “You’ll be back tonight, remember?”   
  
Magnus presses a kiss to Julia’s hair. The contact sends a ripple through her body as she holds Magnus close. “Yeah,” He says, “I’ll be right back.”  


Magnus is not  _right back_.   
  
Julia knows that something is wrong when darkness falls, and he hasn’t come home. The family he is supposed to be escorting knocks on the door of the Hammer and Tongs near midnight.   
  
“He told us to run,” The mother, Marian, says. She has a baby on one hip and a little girl holding her hand. All three of them are filthy. The baby has blood streaked across his cheek but appears unharmed. “I’m so sorry, My Lady, we couldn’t do anything.”   
  
Julia gestures to the boy’s cheek. “Is that Magnus’?” She asks, terrified of the answer.   
  
Marian nods. “I’m so sorry,” She says again.   
  
Julia nods, something sour settling in her stomach. She holds out her hand for the girl.   
  
“Let’s get you cleaned up,” She says, “I think that the Liondown’s said they would be housing you.”   
  
The family is cleaned up, fed, and taken to their safehouse. In the hours that takes, Magnus does not return home. Julia sits outside the Hammer and Tongs and watches down the street that Magnus should be walking through.   
  
“Tea?” Steven asks.   
  
Julia accepts the cup. It’s good, well spiced and heavily sweetened. The drink warms her hands but does not soothe her as it usually does.   
  
“If he’s not here by morning,” Julia announces, “Then I’m going out to get him.”   
  
Steven sits down beside her. “Julia,” He says carefully, “What do you hope to find?”  
  
Julia doesn’t have a good answer. “I don’t know,” She says, “I just can’t leave him out there.”   
  
“Julia,” Steven says, “The people here trust you, they believe in you. As people rebel, they do it in the name of Julia Waxman, Raven’s Roost’s Rebel Queen. What do you think would happen if Kalen found you?”   
  
“He would do to me whatever he’s going to do to Magnus when they find him,” Julia says. It’s no secret in Raven’s Roost that Julia cares for Magnus, that Julia and Magnus are a team. She can’t leave him behind.  
   
“At least come inside for the night,” Steven sighs, “It’s cold out here.”   
  
Julia shakes her head. “You may as well get some sleep, Dad.”   
  
Steven sighs as he rises and makes his way into the house.  


Overnight, it starts raining in Raven’s Roost.  


Julia is ready to leave as soon as Steven wakes. Some small part of her realizes that this is irrational, that Magnus is one man in this town of hundreds that they’ve been safeguarding for nearly a year. Julia has lost men before, is beginning to lose men with frightening frequency. She won’t ever become numb to it but she’s never had this violent a reaction to somebody going missing.   
  
Julia moves through the streets with ease, staying close to safe pockets, buildings she knows she could bop into should guards patrol this quarter. The rain, still going strong, hits the street like pebbles thrown.   
  
Julia sees the blood before she sees Magnus. It washes down the road and into a drain, thin but still striking scarlet. Julia turns the corner to see where the water has been coming from. Magnus is tucked up against the side of a residential building. As Julia rushes up to him she can see that even though his eyes are closed his chest is still moving, lifting up and down with obvious effort.  
  
_“Hey,”_  Julia says as she kneels down beside Magnus. She rubs her hands together and places them on the sides of his face to try and warm him up. “Hey, hey Maggie. You still in there?”    
  
Magnus takes a deep breath. It makes a horrible rattling noise deep in his chest and causes him to cough. Julia helps him further sit up as he clears his lungs.   
  
“Did they make it back?” He asks, his voice rough, “Marian, the kids, did they make it?”   
  
“They’re safe,” Julia assures him, “You did it.”   
  
“We got jumped,” Magnus says, “I got us out of it but I just couldn’t—”   
  
“It’s okay,” Julia says. “I’ve got you. Show me where,”   
  
Magnus shifts. “I got hit in the back. I think it’s stopped bleeding but moving makes it–” He swallows. “I had to stop.”   
  
Julia shuffles across the brick so she can sit behind Magnus. She pulls his shirt up and winces with the squelch that occurs as she releases the fabric from his skin. Embedded in Magnus’ hip is a large dagger, so large that Julia would say that it might just be a  _really big nasty fucking knife._  It’s stuck down to the hilt and as Magnus moves blood gushes out and over the wound.   
  
“Okay!” Julia says, her voice an octave higher. “So, there is a knife.”  
  
“It is at least a nice knife?” Magnus asks.   
  
“It’s real pretty,” Julia says, “It’ll be a great souvenir. I need to get you back to the Hammer and Tongs.”    
  
For the first time, Magnus looks scared. Julia doesn’t blame him. However much sitting here hurts walking back to the Craftsman Corridor is going to be a hell of a lot worse.   
  
“Jules,” He says quietly, “You didn’t let me finish yesterday.”   
  
“No, I didn’t,” Julia says. She regretted it the second that she knew that Magnus was out here, the second that there was any kind of doubt that they could finish their conversation. “What were you going to say?”   
  
Magnus reaches for Julia’s face. His hands are ice cold, brought on from sitting out in the cold all night. “I love you.” He says, the words careful and deliberate in his mouth. “I wanted you to know that I love you.”   
  
“You love me?” Julia asks something warm settling in her chest.   
  
“I do,” Magnus says, “I love you so much it’s stupid. I want to build you a new front door because I know the creaking hurts your ears and I don’t ever want your ears to hurt. Every time I see you smile my chest starts to beat really fast and I smile too. I’m not sure how gentle I am but every time I see you, working for Raven’s Roost, for the future, it makes me feel like I can be gentler too. I started loving you without knowing it and it’s eating me for ages because you didn’t know how just how much.”   
  
For a moment, Julia is quiet. Her thoughts run in an infinite loop  _ilovehimhelovesmeilovehimhelovesmeilovehimhelovesmeilove_  
  
“I hadn’t planned on telling you all that.” Magnus says, suddenly shy, “I didn’t want to inconvenience you. If it upsets you—”   
  
Julia presses a kiss to Magnus’ lips. She is impossibly gentle, hyper-aware of his injured state. Magnus’ hand on her cheek moves to the back of her head to hold her close.   
  
“I love you.” She says, her forehead rested against his, “I don’t have any big fancy speech but just know it’s like a lot.”   
  
Magnus smiles wide. “A lot, a lot?”   
  
Julia laughs, “Yeah, a lot, a lot. Now come on, let me take you home.”  


When Julia all but carries Magnus into the Craftsman Corridor people come running but Julia doesn’t ask for any help shouldering his weight. Steven runs for a healer as Julia helps Magnus up the stairs and into her room. Julia’s room is beautifully simple, whitewashed walls and natural cedar furniture. Her bed is pushed up against one wall, double sized with cream bedding. On the other side of the room is a wardrobe and a little desk with a bench pushed underneath. The room is not immaculate, but it is clean and Magnus is still  _bleeding,_  blood gushing with every step. He feels impossibly fuzzy in a way that he knows has been making Julia nervous their whole walk home.   
  
“I can’t bleed on your sheets,” Magnus says through the fog, “Those are nice sheets, come on Jules.“  
  
“I don’t care about the sheets,” Julia says as she eases him down onto the bed. It hurts, as everything has hurt for the last several hours, but Magnus tries not to show it.   
  
He clumsily stretches his fingers towards his side, but Julia beats him to it, helping him remove his leather armor. They carefully pull his shirt over his head, gently maneuvering around the dagger hilt still in Magnus’ back. After all of the bloody clothing is removed and thrown onto the floor Julia’s hands remain on Magnus’ chest, ever gentle.   
  
Julia chews on her lip as she looks from Magnus to the door, behind which is a swell of people who probably need her. People always need her. Julia needs to check escape routes, evacuate citizens stuck in the battle zone, make sure that her militia is properly armed and so much more every second of every day.   
  
“Fuck it,” Julia says as she removes her boots and socks. “They can give me a couple hours.” She joins Magnus on the bed and carefully crawls around him so that she is on the inside of the bed, up against the wall.   
  
“What are you doing?” Magnus asks.   
  
“Waiting here with you.” Julia says, “Holding your hand as the healer strategically removes this knife. Taking a nap, also hopefully with you. Is that okay?”   
Magnus takes the hand that Julia offers and brings it to his lips.   
  
“Honestly,” He says, “That would be really nice.”  


**Author's Note:**

> hey babes! you made it to the end! title from [every little thing she does is magic](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ifR2A9Afbk), i like the sleeping at last cover. i don't know i decided recently i was done with media that buried their gays and i found taz and i was like! they married their gays! raised their gays from the dead! so i think i might hang here for a bit. also the rebel queen thing was a little bit more subtle but i like the idea of julia being like... a symbol? raven's roost's own raven queen. it sounds like a good idea. 
> 
>  


End file.
